Tuesday, 2 April 2013
HAVING BABIES OUT OF WEDLOCK NOW SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE?
This is a question that needs to be addressed seriously in Nigerian society. The spate of unwed parents in the news especially among our celebrities gives cause for concern.
It's no longer news that western influences have taken firm root in our society, but up until just a few years ago, having children out of wedlock was considered a thing of shame and the parties involved would do everything in their power to have a hasty wedding before the birth of the baby, or if it transpired that one of the parties had no intention of getting married (in most cases the man), the girl would virtually be in hiding until the baby was born. It was considered a thing of dishonour.
This is not in anyway to cast aspersions on babies born under such circumstances, or individuals who have found themselves in this situation, I'm just stating facts.
These days however, it seems as if every vestige if inhibition has been thrown to the dogs. It's now celebrated even in the media, lavish birth announcements are made and no one bats an eyelid. The moral decay has eaten so deeply into society that things that were once considered anathema have virtually been embraced by all and sundry.
The family unit is the basic building block of a nation and a nation is only as strong as the families and households that constitute it.
Psalm 11:3 says: If the foundations are destroyed, what can the righteous do?
Nigeria is in moral freefall at the moment and people might wonder, 'what does it matter when there are worse things going on everyday?'.
Well I believe it matters a lot. Being a Christian I believe God had a reason for instituting marriage, knowing that it would be the best possible environment to bring up children in. People have argued endlessly that it doesn't matter whether two people are married or not, what matters is the love they have for each other. Afterall the marriage certificate is just a piece of paper, and 50% of marriages these days end up in divorce, so what's the point?
It may sound logical but it is a powerful thing when two people make a committment to each other to forsake all others, in the presence of their families and friends, whether in a church, registry or traditional setting. It starts off the new family unit and the children born into it, on a solid foundation and gives all the members a covering which cannot be denied; ask children whose parents never married; ask women who were left holding the baby. The psychological effects can be devastating!
It's true that divorce is on the increase with it's accompanying problems but that is a discussion for another day. My submission is that if people chose to have children together they should go about it the right way; fulfil all righteousness if you like.
I cry for my beloved country because the problems facing us seem so insurmountable but as hopeless as things seem I know that it's not over for us yet. With God all things are possible!